Promising Duelist Meets Fiery End In Climax of “Best American Duelist” Season Finale

Ever since I was in the third grade– back when I bought the original Car Wars black plastic “pocket box”– I’ve always wanted to have a legitimate ongoing Car Wars character that worked his way up from nothing, through a series of Amateur Night events, and into a career as a professional duelist. I can now finally say that I have achieved this life long dream. Almost.

After playing 11 “team amateur night” events consisting of two teams of 4 cars each duking it out at the Armadillo Autoduel Arena, the Amex Proving Grounds, Southtown Autoduel Arena, the Rubberway, and the Waco Double Drum, we were ready for the season finale of our special American Idol style campaign. We’d each started 32 Car Wars characters in each of 8 Killer Kart events. We then played our best 8 characters in a Stinger round. The best four of those graduated to a Joseph Special event. Finally, we played a couple of side games to give some border lined characters a chance to squeak ahead– in each of a 3 player Stinger game, a 3 player division 15 game, and a special 2029 “Rush Hour” Firehawk scenario. Our continuing characters in the Division 15 event drove vehicles pieced together from their salvage– they took their heavily damaged Joseph Specials, removed the destroyed ATG and RL, and retrofitted 5 Killer Kart and Stinger MG’s into their place. Both of our characters damaged their hard earned vehicles and had little to show for it, but our best characters were now aces, just on the edge of getting new skill levels in Driver and Gunner, and ready to pick up their first corporate sponsorships for the pro duel circuit. All they had to do was survive the next event and they’d be tooling around the freeways in a nice easily modified luxury sized death machine!

So finally, eight Hot Shot’s rolled into the Double Drum and began firing at each other. I made an incredibly stupid tactical error. I focused my fire on my opponent’s tough front armor where he fired mainly against my weak side armor. I also fired MG’s more often than FT’s. In three seconds, Buck Lescinsky was knocked unconscious with a clean shot through his right side armor. In four seconds, Tanaka found himself with no right side armor and wide open to easy attacks. He jerked the wheel in order to get fresh armor facing his opponent, but lost control and rolled into the wall. After five seconds, Fernando’s power plant caught fire and all his vehicular weapons burned up along with what was left of his power plant. Finally… after six seconds, my best character took a double blast of flame thrower damage through the right side… and using an off-the cuff application of the fifth edition fire rules, we declared that she’d taken four or five fire markers as a result. We checked for explosion… and in the final second of our campaign, Yahoo McScandle’s care exploded in the most cinematic moment of our 15 games.

I was stunned. Not only had I been completely shut out of the final event (I’d hoped to pick up at least one Hot Shot as a salvaged kill) but my best character in all my years of gaming had literally just gone up in smoke.

I tried to be gracious, pointing out that my opponent had clearly outplayed me… and also… that for the characters to matter, death had to be a factor… and also… that so many of the characters had survived other near death experiences up until now. The exceedingly dramatic nature of the death was epic enough to make it worth it. (Wasn’t it?)

So long, Yahoo. We had a good run.

Yahoo McScandles
Pres 16 (Career high of 21)
Dr 10
Gn 9
HG 3
Kills 5

Background:
———–
4/24/09 Team Amateur Night Game 12: Hot Shots at the Double Drum: Took a double blast of FT damage with at least four fire markers and then died in a massive fireball explosion.
2/14/09 Division 15 (3 Car Event): Custom Cars at the Double Drum: Drove a MG armed Joseph Special built from salvage. Narrowly survived driving over an Iron Horse’s mines, but was killed by a lucky shot while out of control.
1/17/08 Team Amateur Night Game 11: Stock Joseph Specials at the Double Drum: Yahoo crossed the Drum with Cornelius on his tail. Put paint sprayer on automatic. Ducked into the hideaway and stopped to take out a pedestrian shooting his SMG. Fired all RL ammo into Cornelius. Got out of reverse and slowly accelerated… finally killing Cornelius with an ATG shot. Cornelius’s car still got the head-on collision to take Yahoo down to exactly zero DP.
1/16/08 Team Amateur Night Game 10: Stock Stingers at the Rubberway: After a pass, her first opponent turned to go up a ramp, but because we came at each other from the left side of the map, we were both set up for such a turn. Because he rolled really poorly for his reflex roll, he went second… and Yahoo was able to turn with him—but on the outside! Yahoo turned in a little more to close the distance—at first just to try to get his target in arc for hits without the risk return fire. But then Yahoo rammed his opponent, knocking him off the ramp for a 12.5 foot drop with a 40 mph ram against the central platform to boot! It took him forever to cross the arena. Pastor Halfix had lost his power plant in an early pass and had coasted back into the action by cutting underneath the overpasses. Yahoo sped in, slowed down, and took him down with a final coup de gras.
12/29/08 Team Amateur Night Game 8: Stock Killer Karts at the Rubberway: Tailed an opponent early on… shot through the back to make a clean kill on the driver. Went up top as the last cars exchanged their weapons/vehicles. Slowed down to get back in control and was tailed by a weaponless opponent… rear ended and pushed across the board at 90 mph. Across the arena killed that the tailgating idiot, causing him to ram the wall at high speed in a spectacular crash.

Salvage:
——–
Killer Kart salvage: 4 points armor damage (2 back, 2 left), 10 MG shots left. [Salvage Value = $3848 - 50 * 4 - 25 * 10 = $3848 - 200 - 250 = $3398. Cash value = $1699.]
Stinger salvage #1: No front armor, one MG destroyed, 3 power plant hits, and 11 shots left in his MG. [Salvage Vale = $5268 - 460 - 1500 - 250 - 9 * 25 = $2833. Cash Value = $1416.]
Stinger salvage #2: 6 hits front, 10 hits left, one hit to power plant, tire damage: (5, 3, 2), and 36 shots left. [Salvage Vale = $5268 - 460 - 50 - 4 * 25 - 3 * 100 = $4358. Cash value = $2179.]
Stinger salvage #3: One MG destroyed, 1 DP damage to remaining MG with 13 shots left, power plant destroyed, front armor destroyed, 1 hit to right armor. [Salvage Vale = $5268 - 460 - 1500 - 100 - 7 * 25 - 500 = $2533. Cash Value = $1266.]
Joseph Special salvage: No weapons or armor left. (A good power plant, though!) Tire damage: 3, 4, 5, 5. [Salvage Value: $10340 - 2024 - 2500 - 1350 - 650 - 400 = $3416. Cash Value = $1708.]
(Total Salvage Value = $3398 + $2833 + $4358 + $2533 + 3416 = $16538.)
(Total Cash Value = $8269)

Yahoo McScandal’s Customized Joe
(This car was built from the above salvage and somewhat damaged in the Division 15 event.)
Mid-Sized, Standard Chassis, Large Power Plant, Improved Suspension, Puncture-resistant Front & Rear Tires, Driver (Targeting Computer), front: 3 linked MGs, back: 2 linked MGs, right: PS, Armor F35, R20, L20, B20, T4, U10, Accel. 5, HC 2, 4797 lbs, $ 14994

J&D Motors Flashback 2057: Hotshot II

Now the Hot Shot was the example car used to demonstrate damage allocation in just about every edition of the game.  Of course, once you were armed with equipment from any of the Uncle Albert’s catalogues, you probably wouldn’t step near one of the things.  How on earth could anyone think that was a good design?  You might explain it away by conjecturing that the original run was intended for fighting against early chassis and crossbow style ruffians… but I think its actually listed in the AADA guide that these won AADA championships two years in a row.  And that was before the variant fire rules that made it possible for cars like the Hotshot to actually set things on fire!

This problem wasn’t fixed even with 5th edition Car Wars.  The Piranha got numerous improvements… with all three machine-guns moved to the front and loaded with incendiary ammo.  It was more than a match for the old same-old same-old Hotshot….

Anyways, here’s my version that I worked up during the early nineties– er, forties.  With a double dose of the minedropper option, incendiary mines and bullets, and extra armor, this version is a little more survivable.  Not by much, maybe, but it will set things on fire!

Hot Shot II— Luxury; Extra Heavy chassis; Heavy suspension; Large PP w/SCs; 4 Solid tires.  Driver w/Body Armor.  2xMachine Gun w/40xIncendiary; 2xMinedropper w/20xNapalm; 2xFlamethrower w/20xStandard.  4xLink; Fire Extinguisher; Targeting Computer; HD Brakes.  137 pts. Plastic (F: 40 R: 29 L: 29 B: 29 T: 5 U: 5); 1×10 pt., 2 spc. Plastic CA (Driver).  Cost: $19,990, Wgt: 6,520, HC: 3, Top Speed: 90, Accel: 5.

[This vehicle was designed with Compendium 2e rules using SPARK’s nifty design tool.]

J&D Motors Flashback 2057: The Boromir

Some vehicle designs are just meant to happen.  You pick what you want and it all falls into place: no fussing or tinkering.  The Boromir is one of those.  Its as close to a perfect design as any I’ve worked up.  I loved driving a Boromir… you might not win the event, but you could count on taking at least one person down!

The Boromir has the heavy hitting power of the APFSDS anti-tank gun.  Accuracy is improved with a single weapon computer.  The flame cloud streamer is great for nailing vehicles that have stalled… it’s one of the few dropped weapons that can really contribute to an arena fight.  Maneuverability is improved with spoiler, airdam, and heavy-duty brakes.  Tires are not skimped on: they’re solid with the usual guards and hubs, too.  There’s not one extraneous item on the thing.

(Division 20 seems like the optimal budget for an effective vehicle, to me.  If you throw too much more money at it, then you may as well get two vehicles if you have the drivers available.  Division 30 is just outright silly.)

Boromir — Pickup; Heavy chassis; Heavy suspension; Super PP; 4 Solid tires.  Driver w/Body Armor, Personal Fire Extinguisher.  Anti-Tank Gun w/10xAPFSDS; Flame Cloud Streamer w/2xFlame Cloud.  Single-Weapon Computer; HD Brakes; Spoiler; Airdam; Ramplate F.  169 pts. Plastic (F: 60 R: 34 L: 34 B: 29 T: 6 U: 6); 2×10 pt. Plastic Hubs F; 2×10 pt. Plastic Guards F.  Cost: $19,998, Wgt: 7,149, HC: 2 (3), Top Speed: 95, Accel: 5.

[This vehicle was designed with Compendium 2e rules using SPARK’s nifty design tool.  The output above is straight out of the spreadsheet and isn't quite the same format as the original material, but for a nice free tool... I can't complain.  Note that the designer seems to count the weight of personal equipment!]

J&D Motors’ Flashback Series

J&D Motors is proud to present the Flashback series.  We’ve looked over hundreds of vehicle designs from the 2040’s and resurrected the best for special limited production runs.  Each one comes with a gold plated vanity plate with the signature of the duellist that made it a classic.  Feel the power of a Best-of-Breed Duelling experience.  Drive a Flashback.

Falchion: Luxury; Extra Heavy chassis; Heavy suspension; Large PP w/SCs; 4 Solid tires.  Driver.  2 linked Anti-Tank Guns each with 10 shots APFSDS ammo; 2 linked Minedroppers each with extra magazines (one R, one L.)  Single-Weapon Computer.  152 pts. Plastic (F: 50 R: 30 L: 30 B: 30 T: 6 U: 6).  Cost: $19,540, Wgt: 6,600, HC: 3, Top Speed: 90, Accel: 5.

[I drove this one back in the day.  She creates more than her fair share of debris for the arena floor and she considers metal armor to be a delicacy.  I never really got much use out of the MD's, though.  The one time I really thought I'd nailed somebody with it I got a real good T-stop demonstration.]

[This vehicle was designed with Compendium 2e rules.  I just noticed something about SPARK's nifty design tool.  If you increase the quantity of a weapon and leave the number of shots the same... then you'll be in deep trouble later.  For instance, in the above design... if slect 2 ATG's with 10 shots, you'll get only 5 shots each for your ATG's....  No, you've gotta increase the shots every time you mess with the weapon quantity.  Grrr.  Now I've got to fix some designs....]

The Vixen: Ready to Rock

Amex proudly presents a new era in Division 10.

Only the Vixen sports this much firepower: dual heavy machine guns with high density rounds.  But we didn’t cut any corners on protection to bring it to you.  With patented Armoplast composite armor, full component armor protection for you and your power plant, and even wheel-guards– you’ll be able to take the heat while you chew them to pieces.

Test drive one today at your local Amex dealer.

The Vixen: Compact; extra heavy chassis; heavy suspension; medium power plant with platinum catalysts; 4 Hvy Duty tires.  Driver.  2 Heavy Machine Guns each with 9 shots HD ammo front.  30 pts. Sloped Metal and 50 pts. Sloped Plastic: F 14/14,  R 8/10, L 8/10, B 0/16, T 0/0, U 0/0. 2 3 pt. Plastic Hubs Front; 2 3 pt. Plastic Guards Back;  10 pts CA on driver, 10 pts CA on plant.  Cost: $9,845, Weight 4,358, HC 3, Top Speed: 90, Accel: 5.

[I've always liked division 10.  A range of tactics are available and the most irritating equipment in the game won't fit the budget.  Here's an experiment to see if the HMG upsets the balance.  To cram the two guns into division 10 I had to sacrifice on tires and armor.  A subcompact might be a better frame for this concept.  The Vixen is vulnerable to flame weapons, but the driver can afford to take a PFE in with him.  It definitely looks like the HMG w/ HD ammo is the spiritual heir to the ATG with APFSDS ammo.  These two weapons are easily more of a threat to game balance than X-ray lasers.  This design was built according to the rules in the Compendium 2e and uses the HMG from Tanks/UACFH.  Special thanks to SPARK for the nifty design tool.]

This Gwak’s Me More Than It Gwak’s You

Cruising the Division 20 field and putting the “death” back into death sports, the Warthog has been seen more and more as the vehicle of choice of the most sadistic and brutal duelists in the Atlantic Coast Conference.  Drivers of the car are racking up an impressive amount of kills… yet a startling number of them are literally going out in flames of glory.  It remains to be seen whether the “Greho’gwak” special has staying power or if it is just a passing fad.  For the present, the car is certainly contributing to a minor cleansing of the gene pool.

Gothmog’s Refried Honey Glazed “Warthog” Killomatic Special: Sedan; Extra-Heavy chassis; Improved suspension; Large PP w/PlatCats; 4 PR tires.  Driver.  5 linked Heavy Machine Guns each with 7 shots HD ammo front.  Sloped Plastic Armor: F 56, R 25, L 25, B 30, T 5, U 5; 2 6 pt Armored Wheel Hubs front, 2 6 pt Wheel Guards back, 10 pts CA around driver; 10 pts CA around plant.  Cost: $19,831, Wgt: 6,100, HC: 3, Top Speed: 90, Accel: 5.         

[This design is made with Compendiun 2e rules and the ever popular HMG from Car Wars Tanks.  With HD ammo it became the only one-space/two-die weapon in the game... giving this sedan a frightening potential of 10 dice damage per second.  The car is ineffective against large amounts of metal armor... and incendiary weapons could provide the key taking this car out. Note that even if its front armor is breached a few times it is likely to retain a respectable amount of weaponry.  Special thanks to SPARK for the nifty design tool.]  

[Update: This vehicle had been revised due to a misunderstanding of the SPARK design tool: I inadvertantly gave just it 10 rounds for all 5 weapons-- enough for two salvoes.  Loading it up with 7 shots per gun forced me to cut back the wheel guards and switch to PR tires, so squeaking into Division 20 with this thing may not be the best idea.  It might work better as a division 25 concept....]

Mitsui Yamani: A Superior Driving Experience

I drive a Yamani.

I know, I know… it’s been really unpopular to by these Japanese makes for quite some time, but I’m telling you, they’ve nailed this one.  The Shuriken is ancient history, buddy.

You wouldn’t believe the ‘charge mileage this thing gets.  She’s not as sporty as some, but she’s got it where it counts.  She can really haul it if you need to get out of a sticky situation.  The trusty HMG gives me the power of a Vulcan without the bulk.  There’s plenty of ammo there to take care of those annoying romantic yahoos that think that they can pull off the whole cycle gang thing anymore these days.

But what I like best about the Yamani is the rockets.  3 of ‘em, man!  See, that’s what I can’t stand is the dweebs that are pulling onto the freeway.  There’s like nobody for a mile in front of you… and nobody for a mile behind me.  (And I’m in the slow lane because I know better than to get in the way of the hot rod set.)  But there it is… some dude in a pick up matches speeds with me and starts pulling into my lane almost right on top of me.  I can’t stand that!  I’m not the most trigger happy guy around, but I’m sorry… that’s an immediate point-blank shot with 3 armor piercing heavy rockets into the guy’s left armor right there, man.

Funny though… ever since I started driving a Yamani, I really haven’t had to do that….  (Must be our reputation….)  I’m tempted to replace the rockets with fakes and trade them out for extra cargo space, but you know… I just might need to make and example out of somebody. 

Not that the Yamani doesn’t have plenty of space.  What’s the deal with all those cars on the market that have, like, no passenger space whatsoever?  Do they think we’re all teenagers or something?  The Yamani has all of this offensive capability, all of this acceleration… and I’ve still got room for my wife and the two kids. 

But you know, it’s not so practical that I can’t take it into the arena every now and then.  Shoot… just upgrade the computer to a Hi-Res and maybe throw in a little Flame Cloud Discharger and I’m ready to burn it up at division 25.

You just can’t beat it, my brother.

You know… I’d almost go so far as to say that my Yamani is one of the best things that ever happened to me.  My commute is so much more care free now….  I love this car.  (Aw shucks… I’m, tearing up.)  Excuse me, guys… I think I’m going to go take a spin in my new Mitsui Yamani.

(Disclosure: Mitsui provided Jeffro’s Car Wars Blog with a complimentary Yamani in December, 2006.)

Mitsui Yamani: Sedan; Extra Heavy chassis; Heavy suspension; Sport PP; 4 Solid Steelbelted tires.  Driver, passenger,  Heavy Machine Gun with 15 shots HD ammo in Universal Turret; 3 AP Heavy Rockets linked Right,  Targeting Computer.  Plastic Armor: F 40, R 25, L 25, B 35, T 25, U 10; 2 10 pt. Plastic Armored Wheel Hubs Front; 2 10 pt. Plastic Wheel Guards Back; 10 points CA around driver and cargo area.  Cargo: 2 spaces, 140 lbs.  Cost: $21,830, Weight: 5,980, HC: 3, Top Speed: 120, Accel: 10 (with up to 20 lbs of cargo.) 

 [This design was built with material from Car Wars Compendium 2e and the HMG from Tanks.  Special thanks to SPARK for the nifty design tool.]

Womp Rat

New from Amex… the Womp Rat! 

Tired of your enemies chewing up your armor on the side of your car that your guns are mounted?  Feel like your division 5 car is a little one sided?  Not sure whether you want your opponents well done or blown up?  The Womp Rat is the answer to your duelling needs! 

Loaded with two complementary weapon systems on opposite sides, you can choose between rockets and flames any time you like.  If one of your weapons get shot off, just turn the other facing against your opponents.  No muss, no fuss.  Stay in the game twice as long… with the Amex Womp Rat! 

WOMP RAT — Compact, standard chassis, light suspension, medium power plant, 4 standard tires, driver only, FT with 8 shots ammo left, RL with 8 shots ammo right.  Armor: F 25, R 32, L 32, B 20, T 0, U 0.  Accel. 5, HC 1, top speed 97.5.  Weighs 3,654 lbs., costs $4,997. 

MML VARIANT — Change RL to MML, slope armor, and upgrade tires to HD.  Add two points of armor.  Top Speed 100.  Weighs 3,596 lbs., costs $4,998. 

[Design notes:  This vehicle was built with the standard design rules that remained consistent from the pocket box all the way to the compendiums.  If you are using it with 5th editions rules, you will want to revise the other designs as I described here so that the cars are all built according to the same standards.  The medium power plant used here has 8 DP in the original game, standard tires have 4 DP and the HD tires have 6 DP.  With those caveats for 5th edition, this vehicle can be used with every version of the game-- but of course the sloped armor and the MML in the variant were not available from the very beginning.]

Conquistador Motors Presents: The Cortez

Haven’t got time to bother with pesky bandits?  AADA statistics show that the Cortez Tractor Trailer combination suffers over 60% less damage due to highway duels– and those duels will be over in your favor in less than a third of the time than those of comparatively priced competing rigs.  Whether they come at you by land or by air, the Cortez has got you covered!

Only the Cortez gives you so much bang for your buck!  With three KillTech Blast Cannons mounted in universal turrets and twenty heavy rockets, no foe can withstand your withering firepower.  And each Cortez tractor and trailer come with an electronics package that will ensure your targets are hit the first time.

Contact your local Conquistador dealer for a test drive today… and conquer the road with Conquistador Motors!

CORTEZ — Standard Cabover, x-hvy chassis, large power plant, 10 PR tires, trucker, BC in 4-space universal turret, HRSWC.  Plastic Armor: F 63, R 35, L 35, B 15, U 15, T 25, 6 10 point wheel-guards, 10 pts CA around trucker.  HC 1, 11,982 lbs., $77,740.

CORTEZ TRAILER — 40′ van, 8 PR tires, standard kingpin, 2 gunners, 10 HRs linked left, 10 HRs linked right, 4 additional links, BC with extra magazine in 4-space universal turret TF, BC with extra magazine in 4-space universal turret TB, 2 hi-res targeting computers.  Metal/Plastic Armor: F 0/20, RF 20/16, LF 20/16, TF 0/30, UF 0/20, RB 20/16, LB 20/16, TB 0/30, UB 0/20, B 20/16, 4 10 point wheel-guards.  21,140 lbs., $66,200.

COMBINED TRACTOR and  TRAILER — Cargo: Up to 25,878 lbs.and 50 spaces.  Total: 33,122 lbs., $143,940.

The Mitsui Convergence

Finally– a car that suits your individuality and style.  For the duellist that isn’t satisfied with anything less than the best, we provide cutting edge weaponry and the latest in Armorplast(r) technology.  The Convergence from Mistui… it all comes together… right here.

CONVERGENCE.  Midsized; x-hvy chassis; hvy. suspension; large power plant; 6 solid tires, driver, gunner.  Armor: F 45, B 40, R 30, L 30, T 30, U 20.  Mounts laser in turret, MG front, and MG back.  Carries targeting computers for both driver and gunner.  HC 3; acceleration 5 mph.  Weight 5760 lbs; cost $24,820.

LO-TEK OPTION– Replace laser in turret with two linked MG’s.  Remove gunner’s targeting computer.  Add 12 points of armor.  Weight 5,756 lbs; costs $19,062.

 [Here's a car designed to work against the cyclist tactics of the previous post.  It can be improved upon, I'm sure, but every set of designs built with the pocket box rules has to have at leasted one heavily armored Mid with a turreted laser.]