Jeffro's Space Gaming Blog

Microgames, Monster Games, and Role Playing Games

Attention-Challenged Scout Discovered Near Campsite

News has just started coming in about the Boy Scout that got lost this past weekend.  The facts, as I’ve heard them on the radio, are that the boy did not go on a hike with the other scouts, but stayed behind with a scout master.  He turned up missing only after all had returned and had lunch.  The troop searched for a few hours before calling in help.  No conflicts between the scout, his troop, his scout masters, or his parents were known.  He was on medication for ADD, but had not taken it since the day before he went missing.

Its stuff like this that makes me real concerned about the future of
America.  Sheesh.  I mean… why would this guy’s parents send him to the boy scouts?  So he could not go hiking?  You know, maybe if this guy got a little exercise… maybe he wouldn’t need so much medication for his “condition.”

And what’s up with the one scout master staying behind with him?  After all of this stink we’ve had about gays in scouting and teachers and other role models… uh… abusing teenage boys… you’d think this guy would kinda not want to be seen hanging around alone with the kid.

This is the stupidest thing I’ve heard in a long while….  I mean, when I was a scout, we’d at least have the sense to get lost, say, during a hike.  I don’t recall anyone ever turning up missing after everyone got together for lunch.

This is crazy.  And now… they’ve discovered the guy near the campsite.  Oh please!

Fifty years from now people are going to look back on this and say that this was the turning point in the War On Terror.  I tell ya, this will do more to embolden the enemy than the most cutting rhetoric or even the most embarrassing anti-war media campaign.  When the Grain Blight finally hits, this nation of wimps is going to be dead meat.

There has to be more to this than what the media is telling us.  This is just too weird.

***

Related News Updates for displaced Carolinians:

Charges against the members on Greensboro’s Guilford College football team have been dropped.  Earlier this year, the team members allegedly ganged up on three Palestinian students on the grounds of the historic college that’s more well known as a stop on the underground railroad.  Much breast beating over the alleged “hate crime” ensued, and columnists across the country waxed eloquently upon the irony of such deeds occurring on a peace-loving Quaker campus.  The story had the potential of exploding into a scandal bordering on the scale of the Duke Lacrosse Team fiasco, but has since dropped off the radar of major media outlets.  The truth of what happened and why may now never come to light.

“Just because the legal issue has been resolved from the perspective of the legal system doesn’t mean the issues we’re dealing with [on the] campus are resolved,” stated a Women’s Studies professor at the college.  I guess this translates roughly as “just because we unfairly smeared white and black football players as guilty of racist hate crimes before the facts were in, it doesn’t mean that we weren’t right in principle.”  Evidently some people think that there has as yet been insufficient self-flagellation over the incident.

If we can’t have a return to the days of “innocent until proven guilty”, then I for one would at least like to know how many of the football team are being medicated for ADD….

***

“Now, if it had been a NASCAR showdown, he would have been over in the ditch somewhere.” 

When folks wanted to build a race track near Seattle, the “tolerant” fancy-coffee-drinking-types were quick to point out that it would draw undesirable elements to the area.  You know… trashy redneck NASCAR fans and so forth.  Working-class people, even.   “The crime rate always goes up when those people come to town”, and all that.  The house speaker up yonder even went so far as to tag Richard Petty as being “the guy who got picked up for DUI.”

Right.  Richard Petty… that terrible guy that runs that camp for chronically ill children.  Okay… fine.  We’re a little different down here.  Say what y’all want to say about us, but lay off of Richard Petty, okay?  Not that he can’t take care of himself….

***

Hillary Calls for Flag to Come Down

Us rednecks down here are still trying to figure this out.  Apparently, the basis for Hillary’s objection to The Flag is that she believes “that we should have one flag that we all pay honor to” during a time of war.  This makes no sense!  We’ve had one flag to pay honor to down here ever since the fighting began back in 1861.  What is she talking about? 

***

UPDATE 3/21/07: Okay, it turns out the kid didn’t want to go at all.  His dad offered to do pay him five bucks if he went.  The kid left the camp site to go try to hitchhike home– supposedly because he was homesick.  Way to go, dad.  Your son is now the biggest loser since the Star Wars Kid.

Dad says he’s going to give his son a good stern talking to about the dangers of hitchhiking.  If that’s all he’s got to say about this whole depressingly pathetic affair, then I have to wonder if maybe the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree. 

I just wish we lived in a world where scoutmasters could send kids like this back to their clueless parental units.  “My troop is made up of winners.  We don’t have time for losers that don’t want to participate.  Camping and hiking is what we do.  Maybe you should look at signing your son up for a Lego Mindstorms activity at the local Science Center instead.  I will not sacrifice the good of the troop just to babysit your son.”  Why can’t teachers and scout leaders ever be allowed to require anything of the young people they’re responsible for?  What kind of country is this anymore?!

***

UPDATE 3/23/07: Here’s something that’s not completely clear just based on the news coverage.  They found the kid in the middle of the park next to a stream, right?  If you look at maps of the area, if he’d gone uphill from there for a mile, he’d have got to the Blue Ridge Parkway.  If he’d gone downhill, or followed the stream in either direction, then he would have also hit roads pretty quickly as well.  It looks like a pretty major accomplishment to be able to get lost on that campground: this was not an isolated and rugged area like some of the parks out West.  This kid was never far from civilization at all!

We continue to see the dad quoted as saying he needs to have another talk about hitchhiking….  What about that talk that goes like, “if you ever go anywhere with me or another adult and try to slink off without telling anyone, I will give you the biggest whoopin’ you’ve ever had, I don’t care if you are 12 years old!!”

This is pathetic on so many levels.  The dad has no concept of discipline.  The scout master was just plain stupid for staying behind alone with him when he should have sent him back to his parents to begin with.  And the kid couldn’t find his way out of a paper bag!  Argh!

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